I know, I know. “Rasslin” is for kids and rednecks, neither of which describe me. But I’ve been a lifelong fan and WILL be a lifelong fan. Accept it. (My fiancee is still working on that part.)
A critical part of the presentation of any WWE Superstar is their entrance music. It sets the tone for who they are and what they are going to do to their opponent. For fans, they become instant gym playlist fodder for the iPod.
Let’s countdown my Top 10 WWE themes! (And yes, this list will only cover WWE, so some of the best themes in wrestling history won’t be included…today. We’ll get to the rest down the road, ok?)
A few caveats:
- I’m looking for themes from IMPACT players, not low-level guys. I love Santino Marella’s music, but it ain’t making this list.
- The music must be instantly identifiable with the Superstar.
- The music must have longevity. Short-term music doesn’t count.
- Lyrics count, but aren’t the most important thing.
Honorable Mentions:
- Mr. Perfect – In one word: perfection.
- Bret Hart – I wish I had more space on the Top 10. Even today when the Hart Dynasty comes out to a remix of this song, I get goosebumps!
- Razor Ramon – The Bad Guy was one of my favorites
10 – Kane – “Slow Chemical” – Try lifting weights to this song and you’ll understand why it just plain rules.
9 – Christian – “Just Close Your Eyes” – How good is this music? So good that when Christian went to TNA, they made his theme there sound as close to this as legally possible! And the new version he’s been using since his return several months ago is even better.
8 – Demolition – In the late 1980s when entrance music was still a new concept, WWE produced this gem, which could easily hold up today.
7 – “Macho Man” Randy Savage – “Pomp and Circumstance” – Who knew an old piece of classical music played at graduations would one day be most closesly associated with a wrestler? When he changed his music in his late WCW years, it just didn’t work.
6 – Triple H – “The Game” – I thought alot about putting him in, but I realized that this song is 1) EXCELLENT and 2) pure Triple H.
5 – Shawn Michawls – “Sexy Boy” – From the original version done by Sensational Sherri to the more familiar egotistical version of Shawn singing about his own vanity, this song is a critical part of the HBK experience.
4 – Stone Cold Steve Austin – Don’t you wanna drink a beer when you hear this? When the glass shatters, you know hell is going to break loose!
3 – Undertaker – “Graveyard Symphony” – The most epic, timeless music WWE has ever produced. Just a simple funeral dirge that makes you know the Undertaker is on his way to the ring. From the Federation years to the Attitude Era and beyond, this song still works.
2 – Edge – “Metalignus” – This is, by far, the best modern theme. A terrific song that holds up on its own, it helps define Edge’s character – that he believes 100% that he is in the right.
1 – Hulk Hogan “Real American” – Simply the best entrance theme EVER. Even though it wasn’t originally made for Hogan, it fit his character perfectly. From the opening notes, you know EXACTLY who’s coming out!
“The Nature Boy” Ric Flair is scheduled to return to Monday Night RAW tonight in his adopted hometown of Charlotte, NC. Will he become the new General Manager of RAW, following the surprising resignation of Vickie Guerrero? Will he resume his war with Randy Orton, as the former Evolution members continue to implode? Who knows???
To keep everyone ready for the show, here are some great Ric Flair promos!
OK, this morning, I got serious for a moment about yesterday’s Holocaust Memorial shooting. There is NOTHING funny or entertaining about that, let’s be clear.
However, didn’t you wish that there was a team of Jewish Superheroes to thwart the evil plans of anti-Semites and terrorists? Just a little?
Here is my list of who should be in the Jewish Justice League, with all apologies to the DC Comics I grew up reading (and, I’m proud to say, still do on occasion), comprised of fictional characters. I mean, we all know Rahm Emmanual is enough in real life
1 – The Hebrew Hammer!
Yes, Mordechai Jefferson Carver…he would be the “Superman” of the group. He has dedicated his life to saving the Jewish people, so he is the logical choice to spearhead the organization. Plus, with his close, personal connections to other ethnic groups, he should be the face of the organization.
2 – Walter Sobchak, from “The Big Lebowski”
Filling out the “convert” quota is the badass of the group!
3 – Ari Gold, from “Entourage”
Of course we would need an agent to run the behind-the-scenes deals for us. He would double as our PR guy. Licensing, communications…all very important!
4 – Mickey Goldmill, from “Rocky”
He wants Rocky to eat thunder and crap lightning! That sounds fairly Biblical to me!
The group needs to be in tip-top physical and mental condition. Mickey trained the world champ!
5 – Dr. Mark Greene, from “ER”
Every group needs a medic. Who better than Dr. Greene?
6 – Batwoman (Kathy Kane)
The newest version of Batwoman is a Jew! Plus she’s female. Hooray! Sign her up!!!
7 - Magneto
Have you read any X-Men comics or seen any of the movies? That should answer anything you need to know about Magneto. He is a Holocaust survivor, and would be a driving force for this team.
8 - Ross Geller, from “Friends”
It is imperative for a hero group to have a brainy guy, even if he isn’t the most tactile.
There you have it…my Jewish Justice League! Who is missing from the list?
Good morning! Here is what I’m buzzing about on Hump Day!
1) It’s KIDS EAT FREE DAY at California Tortilla!!! Go to any of the 40 California Tortilla locations (MD, DC, VA, WV, PA, DE) and your kid (or one you find on the street) will get a free kids meal when you order an entree. Plus, we’re collecting donations for the Make*A*Wish Foundation (and giving free coupons to all who donate!)
It get’s better! Come find me at the Cleveland Park location (3501 Connecticut Ave NW) between 1pm-2pm today, mention The Buzz and I’ll hook you up!
2) Seriously, what the hell is going on with the Real Housewives of New Jersey? How can next week be the season finale?? I NEED MORE CRAZY!!!!! I need to see Danielle REALLY put the moves on Caroline’s son. I need to see Teresa debate her implant size some more. I MUST find out what Dina’s husband does! PLACATE ME, BRAVO! PLACATE ME!!!!
3) Did you see Buzz Man-Crush Nolan Reimold hit ANOTHER home run? Awesome! Great game by the Orioles as they ended a 5-game losing streak with a 3-1 victory over Seattle. Brad Bergeson had his best game of the year. Should be a fun summer at Camden Yards!
4) Mike Tyson got married. Less than a month after his daughter died. Nothing immoral or illegal…just…not right…
5) The Orlando Magic beat the LA Lakers to cut their series deficit to one game, 2-1. Here is why I don’t care. The entire series is about Kobe Bryant. If the Lakers win, it’s about him being the best. If the Magic wins, it’s about Kobe failing…not about the Magic succeeding. Not much to watch for there, huh?
6) Yesterday, a Slim Jim plant EXPLODED in North Carolina, killing at least 2, with 1 person missing. Yesterday, the WWE released “Macho Man” Randy Savage career retrospective DVD. Coincidence? Say it with me….OHHHH YEAH!
(Please note, I am not trying to make light of the horrific, real tragedy…just point out the very, very strange coincidence. My heart goes out to the workers and families affected by the accident.)
6 – Batwoman (Kathy Kane)
